For some reason The Greatest Of All Time and I were wandering around The One and fancied a naughty snack in the form of milk tea and a naughty cake. Tea Brush was flirting outrageously with us with its piss-poor but strangely seductive garden-style seating area and Elysium-style counter. There were not many naughty cake items on display so it must be good. If Patek Phillipe only have a couple of watches in its window then Tea Brush must also be good...
As usual ordering is out of my hands as a happy wife is a happy life. An apple green tea for myself and a mochi sesame oolong milk tea for the happy wife. The naughty cake to share was a roasted cheese topped matcha chiffon cake.
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| Best to use mild soap and warm water to get rid of this |
Enough with the turd above. The only satisfaction I got from Tea Brush was getting a seat after loitering around the mall like a HK protester. My apple green tea was nothing to write about but I have wasted a few kilobytes of the world wide web space right here. The mochi sesame oolong milk tea looked like it should be the shit but it was, frankly, shit. Donald Trump's tweets leave a better taste in my mouth. As for the chiffon cake, it was as dry as a lyophylized prison bath sponge. It was so bland it was offensive. And who came up with the idea of adding a layer of smegma on top? To be honest the dry martian dust cake needed the moistness of the perpetually molten cheesey smegma but the thought of it right now is giving me PTSD.
The Ho Down says: Tea Brush? More like Tea Thrush.
